Teaching Children About Discipline And Reward Systems

There tends to be an agreement by most parents that discipline in its more simplistic definition is highly desirable, but it is not so clear whether disciplining children is the best way to help them become more conscientious.

Numerous research papers seems to suggest that punishing children increases aggression and violence within them. Additional evidence also indicate that you acquire more influence with children when you give up trying to use power to control them.

Is it therefore not better that when having a choice between authoritarian control and permissiveness, adults should focus on building self-discipline through influence?

Authority can have multiple meanings, including that based on expertise, based on position or title, or even on power. Children especially, don’t respect power authority, even if they have to obey it, or whether it comes with the traditional reward-and-punish approach. Rewards and punishments are external controls; take away the control, and the behaviour modification disappears

Using rewards for behavior modification is difficult, given the need to reward consistently and almost instantaneously. If a reward seems too far removed in time, it will be less potent. In particular, you cannot prevent children from getting rewarded by others for unacceptable behavior

When children can acquire their own rewards, rewards no longer work for behaviour modification, as it have to be felt as attainable, or children will give up and stop striving

Did the above remind you of your own child, or that of a family friend in your neighbourhood. Are you concerned that you might be losing the war on self-discipline when it comes to children?

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Don't forget to get others to visit the site as well.

Thanks and Good Luck,

Gerard.

Longing For A Dream Child – Fact or Fantasy?

Are you a parent who come across well-behaved and motivated children, and then wondered why your own offspring do not have such qualities? You then start thinking that somewhere along the line you missed out on something and at worst, even doubt your parenting skills.

Many experienced practitioners in the field of education, brought about the realization that all parents are keen for their kids to grow up to be obedient, bright, honest, successful, and energetic. Complementary studies set about trying to discover what was going wrong with the methods used by such parents, and why other parents could enjoy fruitful, life-long relationships with their satisfied children.

One of the first things that was noticed was that ‘There are no difficult children, there are difficult parents.’ It is parents who are largely responsible for how their children ultimately turn out to be. Parents need to themselves decide what proper and improper behavior really is, and to properly differentiate between right and wrong. Children emulate their grown-ups, particularly parents.

It is advised for parents not to be too authoritarian, or too lenient. A subtle mix of democracy and firmness is needed…Discipline should not be a punishment. It should be a boundary guideline, which cannot be overstepped with impunity. Parents, who take personal interest on a day-to-day basis, are able to spot behavior changes early and take remedial measures.

Parents who are too busy with their business, professional or social activities cannot hope to enjoy good rapport with their kids. Particularly when the child is approaching the teens, and hormone changes are creating stress for the child’s personality, parents have to be on hand, and act as counselors and companions.

Habits which must be cultivated includes letting children enjoy privacy, reinforcing good behavior, listening attentively to the child, having family meetings, discussing the consequences of behavior, praising, establishing an atmosphere of trust, etc.

Even if your child is a dream one, does not mean that you cannot learn any more, as lifelong learning is the order of the day. It is therefore imperative that you visit the below site for even more tips on how to rear that dream child.

===> http://tinyurl.com/happykids4life

Success To You and Your Children,

Gerard.